By His healing hand
Thank you so much for those who have prayed for me when I was down with dengue last July. Yes, I was bitten by the small, yet deadly Aedes mosquito while on an exploratory trip to Sanggau in west Kalimantan. Some until today still refuse or can't believe that I was infected. Nevertheless,thank you so much for your care and concern.
As I procrastinate to put this experience down in writing, one of Rev. Poh's sermons gave me an encouragement and reminded to put this into action. His sermon entitled, Yam Seng to God, text taken from Psalm 116:12-23. Verse 12 says, what can I offer the Lord for all His goodness to me? Indeed there are so much that He has done in my life that I could never pay back. And in the sermon, he said, "Lift up the cup of salvation and call on Jesus name". Yes! With a grateful heart, a receptive heart, a praise full heart and a testifying heart, I am putting this small portion of the many great wonders that Jesus has done in my life into a written testimony.
It was Friday evening when the fever started,2 days after our team returned from Sanggau. We were in New Hope ministry, which is under the umbrella of World Outreach. It has a similar setting to Mount Hope, only that the children attend schools which are near the town. It was a blessed trip and amazing to see how our Lord guided the team and worked wonderfully in every moment. I even saw the junction image that was in my prayer a few months back.
Thinking that it was a normal fever, I took 2 panadol tablets (pain killer) and went to bed.
I woke up Saturday morning, still with a feverish feeling. I thank God for His mercy that the supposedly trip to Brunei did not materialize. I felt feverish the whole day and my wife got a little anxious as Koon and Justin were supposed to fly to Singapore the next day. They had booked their flight earlier in the month without me because of my supposedly trip to Brunei. Then Sunday morning came, and I was still having the fever but I tried to hide from Koon and Justin how bad it was. I wanted them to have a good holiday, we prayed and I sent them to the airport safely.
After church service I went home, spending quiet time in reading the scriptures and praying. I did not know what was happening to me but sensed that something was not right. I continued hoping that my fever would go away soon. For obvious reason, it did not but it got worse in the evening. So I took a stronger pain killer and yet the fever came in at a closer interval after each dose. There was a tremendous discomfort behind my eye balls. I kept praying, drank lots of water and slept a lot.
Then it suddenly hit me to switch on my computer to Google for symptoms of dengue. I do not know why but that was the first prompting that I received. And most of the descriptions on the list matched my conditions. The scary news is that, there is no medication for cure! I finally gave in and messaged my doctor friend and was advised to get myself a check-up and blood test. Thank God for cell group members who prayed for me and offered to send me as I was getting too weak to drive.
Even before the blood test, I had a strong feeling in my heart that it was probably dengue. I spent a wonderful timeto worship God at home and beautiful intimate time to pray. God never promised a trial free life on earth and I was prepared with a joyful heart andknew my hope in our Lord Jesus. During the past evenings, the greatest comfort is that I did not have fear. I also did not feel lonely even though Iwas alone at home. Instead I had great peace even though there was aching in the body. How amazing!
Wednesday morning, Brother Stephen came to pick me up to go to the policlinic for my checkup. And a few hours later,the result confirmed that I was dengued! I was given the option to be hospitalized or stay at home. Being stubborn, I opted to stay at home,alone! And I have to go back to have my blood platelets check every day! I also had to call Koon and Justin and obviously they insisted to fly back soonest, which was 2 days later as it was school holiday and there were no seat available.
Thank God for His HolySpirit that I can pray. One of the distinct prayers I remembered was asking for our Lord to reveal the reason for this trial and praise God, that I can see that this trial binds the church together in prayers and develops patience, faith, love and trust in many people, including myself.
As there was no medication for cure, it was by God’s grace that I recovered. My body needs to build up its immune system to fight the virus. Death never once occurred in my mind as I knew Jesus have defeated it and He is my healer and savior. And for the next two weeks of recovery, it was a great comfort even in pain. How odd is that statement but it is what I experienced.
I thank God for preparing me, by equipping me with His word through the disciple class and various bible studies and seminars. My faith and foundation grew stronger with every trial. What a wonderful journey indeed. He is changing me every moment. I can confidently know that He is a faithful God, who is always by my side. He is also my friend and my refuge in time of storms.
As I am writing this, in the background; the lyrics of the song "Help me find it" reminded me of how wonderful our Savior that gave all believers hope and a victorious life.
"I'm giving You fear and You give faith. I giving you doubt. You give me
Grace. For every step I've never been alone. Even when it hurts,You'll
have Your way. Even in the valley I will say. With every breath.
You've never let me go. I will wait for You. You've never failed before.
I will wait for You"
Emotions and feeling will come and go. And I can never stop emphasizing that it is very important for every believer to be grounded in the Word of God. Grass will wither, flowers will fade and the Word will last forever. I can't stop praising God for putting His Word into my heart so that I can stand firm especially in some of my darkest moments.
Trust in the Lord with your whole heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all ways acknowledge him and he will make your paths straight. (Prov 3:5-6)
Thank God that Christ in my life and that He will never leave; nor will forsake me (Hebrew 13:5b)
My health may fail, and my spirit may grow weak, but God remains the strength of my heart; he is mine forever (Psalm73:26)
May this be an encouragement to many. Trust in our Lord and step out in faith daily and we will experience him and grows in our confidence. For, He is my faithful God and I will hold on to his promises until I see Him again. May we all find the purposeful life that God has intended. Let us all pray unceasingly, equipped our self with His Word and never forsake gathering together (cell group is a great place to start!). All glory to our Lord Jesus.