Conversation with an AhLian mum.

Every parent is a beginner and we need help from time to time. As parent myself I learn from experience and experience shared by friends. Interestingly, today I just had a rather cute msn chat with a friend living in the busy capital city of Malaysia and I can't help it but to share it here. Have a read:

sl says (3:01 PM):
i want to check with u

MahaguruS1A says (3:01 PM):
shoot

sl says (3:02 PM):
lately my son, he wakes up crying with fright
these few nites and just now also

MahaguruS1A says (3:03 PM):
lately, as in when did this start?

sl says (3:03 PM):
few nites ago

MahaguruS1A says (3:03 PM):
he can converse with you guys right?

sl says (3:03 PM):
no not yet, age 2 only

MahaguruS1A says (3:04 PM):
oh sorry 2 yo, I thought he was 3

MahaguruS1A says (3:04 PM):
so he can comprehend what so say to him right?

sl says (3:04 PM):
he can understand what we say
but he can't converse yet

MahaguruS1A says (3:05 PM):
its ok, he can nod and shake his head rite?

sl says (3:05 PM):
slept halfway just now woke up crying scared

sl says (3:05 PM):
no he can't

MahaguruS1A says (3:05 PM):
oh....?

sl says (3:05 PM):
is something disturbing him ?
how come he wakes up with fright?

MahaguruS1A says (3:05 PM):
when he wakes up, is anyone around him?

sl says (3:06 PM):
nope

MahaguruS1A says (3:06 PM):
hmm... does he always sleep alone?

sl says (3:06 PM):
afternoon o yes

MahaguruS1A says (3:06 PM):
ok, usually kid don't like to wake up being alone

sl says (3:06 PM):
my maid then has to make him sleep

sl says (3:06 PM):
but last time not like that
when he wakes up he does not cry
he opens the door and come out on his own

MahaguruS1A says (3:07 PM):
normally kid will wake up or sub consciously wake up and when he finds no one around him, they will get scared. So most probably he had a bad nightmare last week.

MahaguruS1A says (3:07 PM):
So next time just sit down with him and ASSURE him that you are just nearby so that the next time if he wakes up he knows that you are there for him. Even if he doesn't know how to talk but he can understand what u say. And keep to you words! Never break your promise. This is important.

MahaguruS1A says (3:08 PM):
if you busy, just make sure ur close to him where you or he can see you

MahaguruS1A says (3:08 PM):
sorry me no expert, just my personal experience

sl says (3:09 PM):
is ok

sl says (3:11 PM):
these few days i found him waking up in tears

sl says (3:11 PM):
like in fear

sl says (3:11 PM):
usually not like that

MahaguruS1A says (3:12 PM):
like I said because he wakes up and find no one around him mah

sl says (3:12 PM):
he has been waking up for the past months being his usual self

sl says (3:12 PM):
but these few days are different

MahaguruS1A says (3:12 PM):
once he is traumatized, he will remember the scary experience

MahaguruS1A says (3:13 PM):
sit down to talk to him and reassure him that you are there for him, like what I said earlier

sl says (3:13 PM):
how come this fear develops suddenly

MahaguruS1A says (3:13 PM):
communication to a child is important, talk to him, he can comprehend

MahaguruS1A says (3:13 PM):
fear? I guess its just a bad nightmare, it happens

sl says (3:13 PM):
and especially this month is the ghost festival

MahaguruS1A says (3:13 PM):
sorry no comment on that
I am a scientific person

sl says (3:15 PM):
i am half half

MahaguruS1A says (3:15 PM):
so remember to be there with him the next time
Talk to him, reassure him that you are there for him

sl says (3:17 PM):
that one not a problem

MahaguruS1A says (3:17 PM):
so wats the problem?

sl says (3:18 PM):
he has never cried like that before

MahaguruS1A says (3:18 PM):
.....

MahaguruS1A says (3:18 PM):
so u expect him not to cry?

sl says (3:19 PM):
aiya not like that

sl says (3:19 PM):
i know his normal cries

MahaguruS1A says (3:19 PM):
(Obviously sl didn't get what I was talking all this while!!)

ok SL, just try to be near him this week when he is asleep
Don't let him wake up alone, can u try that?

MahaguruS1A says (3:19 PM):
yes?

sl says (3:20 PM):
that is ok

sl says (3:20 PM):
probably he is afraid to be alone

MahaguruS1A says (3:20 PM):
!! that what I said all this while!!

MahaguruS1A says (3:20 PM):
sigh*

sl says (3:20 PM):
ok ok

sl says (3:21 PM):
we will see these few days

MahaguruS1A says (3:21 PM):
just be with him... simple thing to do right. Good luck

sl says (3:21 PM):
thanks
bye

Comments

yappy said…
so nice of u .. :)

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